


history

by flowers2grow



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Childhood Friends, Cute, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Light Angst, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-27
Updated: 2018-10-30
Packaged: 2019-08-08 08:34:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16426028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowers2grow/pseuds/flowers2grow
Summary: one shots about our favorites.





	1. bittersweet

**Author's Note:**

> rey is graduating and ben comes home.

It was bittersweet when they met again, almost a year after he left.

It was her graduation and she was outside smoking, something she had promised him she would try to quit. That was before he left though, and her uncle didn’t mind her bad habit. 

It was when she had just a few puffs left of her cigarette that she heard him, and he must have stood there a good while because she hadn’t heard anyone walking up the long gravel road.  
“Those will kill you, you know.” If she didn’t know him as well as she did she might have thought he sounded angry, but she could hear the clear amusement in his voice, and maybe just a tiny bit of disapproval.

She didn’t turn to him just yet, instead she threw the cigarette butt on the ground and pressed it down into the earth with her new shiny ballerina shoes that her uncle had bought her for just this occasion. When she did look up at him she found him smiling, a bright crooked smile that she hadn’t seen for the last 365 days, a smile she had missed every single one of those days.

“Hey”  
“Hey yourself” It felt strange, to hear her voice after his. Good strange.  
“Congratulations on your graduation”  
“You came.”

On one of the walls in her room, taped up next to her adoption papers, were the postcards he sent her from the different places he went. There was nothing written on them, just like she had asked when he climbed into her room a year ago to kiss her goodbye. Just something so she knew he was safe. On the latest one she received he had written just three words. She had taped that one with the words facing the room so she could look at it whenever she walked past.

“Of course I came. You graduating is a wonder, I wouldn’t have missed it for the world.”  
She felt the smile on her face starting to hurt her cheeks, and soon she would cry she knew. “Shut the fuck up.”  
They had started moving closer to each other, just like before, always seeking each other out. When they were close enough he wrapped his long arms around her waist and she stood up on her toes to reach around his neck. Both sighed, the kind of sigh you let out when you get home after the longest day. 

After some time, a few seconds or a few minutes, maybe even hours, they let go.  
“Come on, there’s cake.” She started pulling on his arm toward the house but he pulled her right back to his embrace, kissing her on the top of her head.  
“Just a few more minutes”, his voice muffled by her hair. She looked up at him, and he looked down at her.  
“Of course. We have all the time in the world.”


	2. stay, if only for this morning.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> rey is bad at staying.

She woke up to someone snoring into her ear, loudly. She turned around slowly to face the culprit and came face to face with a big crooked nose, wide lips open slightly and wild dark hair covering the better part of the eyes. She admired him for a bit, last nights conquest. He was noone special really, a guy in her mythology class who shyly wanted to know if she needed help studying. She didn’t, but he was tall and muscular enough to catch her interest and the second they got to his dorm she had kissed him because she had wanted to since she first sat down behind him. He had been shocked at first, he told her he didn’t think she wanted him like that, that he had wished but didn’t dare hope. She didn’t like to hear about wishes or hope so she had kissed him again and the rest was history. 

Now she was lying naked in his bed, which really was too small to hold the both of them. She figured he hadn’t slept with a lot of people, he hadn’t said anything but you could tell with those sort of things. For just a second she let herself think about how he would treat her if they were to date. He would be nice, of course, he would tell her she looked beautiful even when she didn’t, he would cuddle her if she was sad and hug her if she was angry. She imagined herself helping him become amazing in bed, teaching her what she liked and him teaching her what he liked, discovering what they both liked together. She let herself imagine how they would continue dating after college, get engaged and then perhaps an accidental pregnancy. She let herself imagine a white-picket fence and a large fluffy dog, a kiss on the cheek when they left for work and a home-cooked dinner made together when they got home. She found herself doing something she rarely did, she longed. He wasn’t special really, but he was good and she wasn’t. Those things weren’t for her. 

She left the bed as quietly as she could, picking up her clothes throughout the room. When she went to put on her underwear she found herself doing something else she never did, she left them. She wanted him to know she was here, that it had been real to her too. 

This was usually the best and the worst part, sneaking out in the morning. The best, because she got to go home, and the worst because she always left with a weight in her stomach that sometimes would take days to go away. This sort of thing had been fun last fall, when she was raw and wild and determined to feel something that wasn’t misery. Now she was lonely and cold, walking back to her dorm. 

She was only five minutes away from having left him when she heard her name being shouted behind her. As she turned around she found him there, running toward her. She wanted to run toward him too, like in the movies, but she found herself frozen on the spot when she saw what was in his hand. Her pastel pink thongs waving like a flag in the wind. When he arrived in front of her she found herself pulling them out of his grasp and stuffing them into the pocket of his sweatpants that he must have pulled out in a hurry because there was a big stain of what she hoped was ice cream on his left thigh.   
“Those were for you to keep.” she muttered, now regretting her decision to leave anything behind at all.  
“Why?”   
Stupid virgin boy, she thought.   
“So you could have something to jerk off to.” she snapped to him.  
“Why didn’t you just stay then? I wanted you to stay.” he made it sound like it was obvious she was supposed to stay, like she wasn’t supposed to leave at all. It felt unfamiliar and strange and warm, still she found herself shivering.  
“You know why I didn’t stay.” because of course he knew, everyone did. There wasn’t a soul on campus who hadn’t heard of her escapades, whether they were real or not. She looked off behind his shoulder, she didn’t want to see the rejection and disgust on his face. She knew she wasn’t disgusting but she also knew it would still hurt to see it on his face nonetheless.  
“I don’t care. I want to know you, believe it or not.”   
“I know what you want. I’m not stupid.”  
“If you think I only want to fuck you then you’re more stupid than you let on.”

She finally looked up at him, which she realized immediately was a mistake. His eyes were full with determination and admiration and something that she didn’t want to call love but felt like the closest she had ever come to it. She opened her mouth to reject him once and for all, he was nothing special after all. Just another guy in one of her classes she had fucked. But all that came out was a puff of air and then an “Alright.”   
Because he really wasn’t just another guy in one of her classes that she had fucked, and she figured that she hadn’t really had a stomach ache when she had left his dorm, just a really big feeling of longing to get back in that bed with him.

He took her hand in his and they started walking back to his dorm together, not really saying a word. They didn’t need to.


End file.
